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Joke Feb 13, 02:06 AM

The Workshop Consensus

Writing workshop. Twelve people around a table. Manuscript passed around.

'Vivid imagery,' says the first.
'Authentic voice,' says the second.
'Oscar Wilde would be jealous,' says the third.
'The pacing is exquisite,' says the fourth.

Author glowing. Best day of her life.

Instructor leans back: 'Wonderful. Now β€” who actually read past page two?'

Eleven people suddenly need coffee.

Joke Feb 4, 10:32 AM

The Murder Mystery Retreat

Manuscript retreat. 10 writers. Beautiful cabin. Host announces: "We'll do a murder mystery game!"

Day 1: Clues hidden. Everyone suspects everyone.

Day 2: Accusations fly. Drama.

Day 3: Actual murder.

Of my chapter 12. Someone rewrote it entirely.

Police refused to investigate. "Creative differences aren't criminal, sir."

The murderer submitted my book under their name. Won an award.

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"All you do is sit down at a typewriter and bleed." β€” Ernest Hemingway