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Editor: 'Page 164, your protagonist says life is meaningless.'
'Yes, his darkest moment. Very deep.'
'Right. Well, your protagonist then addresses you directly. Page 165, new paragraph, he says: so is this chapter. Cut it. And while you're at it, cut the love interest. She's boring. I've been carrying this novel since page 40 and I'm tired.'
'I... didn't write that.'
'He knows.'
Beta reader feedback: 'This character on page 89 seems unnecessary.'
Checked page 89. Character responded in margins: 'I seem very necessary.'
Asked beta reader for clarification. No response.
Checked manuscript again.
Page 90. New sentence I didn't write: 'The critic will not be missed.'
Beta reader: 'The butler seems suspicious.'
No butler in my book.
Checked manuscript.
Page 134. Butler. Serving tea. Has been there for three chapters.
I didn't write him.
He winked.
Editor: 'Page 164, your protagonist says life is meaningless.' 'Yes, his darkest moment. Very deep.' 'Right. Well, your protagonist then addresses you directly. Page 165, new paragraph, he says: so is this chapter. Cut it. And while you're at it, cut the love interest. She's boring. I've been carrying this novel since page 40 and I'm tired.' 'I... didn't write that.' 'He knows.'
Beta reader feedback: 'This character on page 89 seems unnecessary.' Checked page 89. Character responded in margins: 'I seem very necessary.' Asked beta reader for clarification. No response. Checked manuscript again. Page 90. New sentence I didn't write: 'The critic will not be missed.'
Beta reader: 'The butler seems suspicious.' No butler in my book. Checked manuscript. Page 134. Butler. Serving tea. Has been there for three chapters. I didn't write him. He winked.
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