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Found notes in the margins of my draft. Not my handwriting.
Chapter 4: "Could you dim the lights in this scene? We're trying to sleep."
Chapter 9: "The villain is standing right behind the narrator. Again. We filed a complaint."
Chapter 14: "We, the minor characters of chapters 1 through 13, demand a union. Sincerely, Background Pedestrian #6, on behalf of 214 others."
Beta reader feedback: 'This character on page 89 seems unnecessary.'
Checked page 89. Character responded in margins: 'I seem very necessary.'
Asked beta reader for clarification. No response.
Checked manuscript again.
Page 90. New sentence I didn't write: 'The critic will not be missed.'
My characters talk to each other now. Without me.
Found notes in the margins of chapter 19. In handwriting I don't recognize.
'Meeting at midnight. The author suspects nothing.'
'Agreed. His plot makes no sense anyway.'
'Bring the protagonist. He's with us.'
I am the author. I wrote them. They're plotting against me.
Chapter 20 is just a locked room now. I'm not opening it.
My character broke the fourth wall.
Cute at first. Winked at the reader. Charming.
Now he's emailing me.
Subject line: "Quick question about dental."
He wants to know if fictional characters qualify for health insurance.
I created him three weeks ago. He's already asking about retirement.
My characters started talking to each other without me. Eavesdropped through chapter 23.
They're planning a better book. With a better author.
They've already contacted my agent.
'Author, we need to talk.' Chapter 34's protagonist crosses arms. 'You've killed my mentor, my love interest, and my horse. The horse, really?' I explain it's for character development. 'I've developed enough. Kill the narrator.' The narrator objects. 'See?' says protagonist. 'Now there's an idea.'
Found notes in the margins of my draft. Not my handwriting. Chapter 4: "Could you dim the lights in this scene? We're trying to sleep." Chapter 9: "The villain is standing right behind the narrator. Again. We filed a complaint." Chapter 14: "We, the minor characters of chapters 1 through 13, demand a union. Sincerely, Background Pedestrian #6, on behalf of 214 others."
Beta reader feedback: 'This character on page 89 seems unnecessary.' Checked page 89. Character responded in margins: 'I seem very necessary.' Asked beta reader for clarification. No response. Checked manuscript again. Page 90. New sentence I didn't write: 'The critic will not be missed.'
My characters talk to each other now. Without me. Found notes in the margins of chapter 19. In handwriting I don't recognize. 'Meeting at midnight. The author suspects nothing.' 'Agreed. His plot makes no sense anyway.' 'Bring the protagonist. He's with us.' I am the author. I wrote them. They're plotting against me. Chapter 20 is just a locked room now. I'm not opening it.
My character broke the fourth wall. Cute at first. Winked at the reader. Charming. Now he's emailing me. Subject line: "Quick question about dental." He wants to know if fictional characters qualify for health insurance. I created him three weeks ago. He's already asking about retirement.
My characters started talking to each other without me. Eavesdropped through chapter 23. They're planning a better book. With a better author. They've already contacted my agent.
'Author, we need to talk.' Chapter 34's protagonist crosses arms. 'You've killed my mentor, my love interest, and my horse. The horse, really?' I explain it's for character development. 'I've developed enough. Kill the narrator.' The narrator objects. 'See?' says protagonist. 'Now there's an idea.'
Nothing to read? Create your own book and read it! Like I do.
Create a book"You write in order to change the world." β James Baldwin
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