Kafka's Amazon Review

Franz Kafka left a one-star review on Amazon: 'Ordered a book about transformation. Woke up as a giant insect. Product not as described. Tried to return it but couldn't reach the doorknob. Customer service was unhelpful—they just kept screaming. My family seems disappointed. Would not recommend.' Amazon's response: 'We're sorry your experience was... alienating. Perhaps try our Prime membership for faster metamorphosis?'